So let's download since it's been awhile. The Bachelorette and her men are still in my home state of Pennsylvania at the beautiful Nemacolin Woodlands Resort - which, btw, I have looked up and it's only 6.5 hours from my home in Michigan and Nick and I are totally going there for our 10th wedding anniversary.
Wait, where were we? Yes, JoJo and the guys are finishing up their time in Pennsylvania. Luke has a rose from his 1 on 1 date, Jordan has the group date rose, and Alex has a rose from the 2 on 1 date.
Chad has just been eliminated during his 2 on 1 date against Alex. Just as we think we have seen the Rise and Fall of Chad he shows up at the guys' pad for one last fight.
I'll be honest, I zoned out because it was Chad saying nonsense. Alex arrives home to hero's welcome complete with sparklers and a cupcakes. He "slayed the dragon"!
JoJo looks amazing in a white, sequin cut out dress, and that girl has been doing her squat. Her booty is amazing!
Evan starts to annoy me during this rose ceremony because he's acting like a weeney and trying to find "The Next Chad" in the bunch. I think he's more interested in the drama than in JoJo. Alas, he gets a rose and is safe for another week.
JoJo sends James F and Daniel the Canadian home
JoJo announces Grant, Vinny, Jordan, Derek, Chase, James Taylor, Alex, Evan, Wells, Robby, and Luke are headed to Uruguay!
1 on 1 #1
The guys make it to Uruguay and Jordan is invited on the on the first 1 on 1 date. This is actually Jordan's first 1 on 1, which is weird because I feel like he's already had one - probably because he is featured so much and he's all over the damn internet.
I honestly find this date super boring and thanks to editing it zooms by fast. They make out on a yatch and then go to dinner where Jordan denies cheating on his ex. That's all JoJo needs to hear because she's smitten. Jordan is given a rose and is safe another week.
Meanwhile... Derek and Alex find a gossip rag as Vinny is giving them haircuts. In this rag magazine featuring JoJo ex prior to the Bachelor/Bachelorette spewing lies. I would bet money that the producers planted the magazine.
The producers then tell JoJo about her ex's blasphemy. She's upset to say the least.
What I get from this is that her ex is an asshole, Ben was the truest love she's ever had because she felt respected, and yes, she did befriend her ex once she got back from The Bachelor.
JoJo feels the need to discuss it with 'her guys'. They all find it a non-issues, like, duh, hot girl, who cares what she has or hasn't done!
Glad that's out of the way...
Vinny, Evan, Alex, Wells, Grant, Luke, Chase, Derek, Alex, and James Taylor head to the sand dunes with JoJo to do some sand boarding!
"I think I'm going to get another bloody nose today." - Evan
Based on this group date pickings Vinny, Grant, Wells, and Evan's days are numbered.
After playing in the sand it's time for the cocktail portion of the evening.
JoJo gives Derek the group date rose to reassure him of her feeling for him. Alex starts acting like a mega dick, calling Derek's rose a "pity rose."
I'm starting to feel bad for Chad because I'm thinking Alex is a bully. Chad's gone so now he needs someone else to pick on. Cue Derek. #asshole
1 on 1 #2
Robby gets the second 1 on 1 of the episode. I'm convinced Robby is a Ken doll. The proof is in the picture...
He drops the first "L" bomb on the season. I find this a tad weird as we haven't seen them bond and connect this season. It would have been nice if the whole first half of this season was not focused on Chad.
Derek confronts Robby, Jordan, Chase, and Alex because of their "mean girls" click, and none of them give an eff. I mean come one Derek. Be a man - keep it shut and keep your eye on the prize!
Chris Harrison announces that there will be not cocktail party, and it's time for JoJo to eliminate some bitches!
JoJo (looking great in a emerald green cut out dress) ends up cutting Grant, Evan, and Vinny.
Don't cry. Another recap will be up next Wednesday!